Alicia Seaver is Vice President of Memory Care Operations for EPOCH Senior Living and a Certified Memory Impairment Specialist. Every month, she addresses a specific issue related to memory and memory care. If you’re interested in hearing about a particular topic, please send a note to [email protected].
Q: We’re preparing to move our loved one with memory loss into a dedicated memory care community. What are some ways we can make the transition easier?
A: We understand that moving a senior loved one into memory care can be a difficult, emotionally charged decision. Some caregivers may feel uncertainty or guilt about whether they are doing the right thing. This is completely normal. Rest assured, you are making a decision that will benefit your loved one – and you.
Communities like Bridges® are specifically designed to cater to the unique symptoms that come along with Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of memory loss. With expert, around-the-clock care and a lifestyle that centers around all aspects of wellness – memory care communities enable families to let go of their full-time caregiving duties and instead focus on nurturing their relationships with their loved ones.
Once the decision has been made, however, it’s time to focus on the next hardest task – making the actual move into the community. It’s true that a person with dementia can experience stress when they are changing living environments. While this stress is a natural part of the process and is typically temporary in nature, it can still be difficult for family members to experience. The good news is that as individuals begin to make friends and settle into the daily life and activities of the community, they will adjust to their new home and feel more comfortable.
Your biggest resource and support during this time will be the team members at the community who have many tools to minimize the stress associated with changing environments. They are trained to learn about each resident’s life history, likes and dislikes, and individual abilities so that they can connect and build meaningful relationships that will ultimately help the resident feel at ease.
Read on for some things you can do to prepare for the transition – and even after the move – to help reduce the emotional impact on your loved one and yourself.
- Look after yourself first.
Having to handle all the details and preparations for a move can make it tempting to put your health on the back burner. Yet it’s vital you take good care of yourself so you can handle the changing dynamics successfully and provide the best possible support to your loved one. Stay healthy by making nutritious meal choices and exercising regularly. Being proactive will reduce the likelihood of any issues arising from stress.
- Be realistic when setting goals.
Caring for a loved one with memory loss is already physically and emotionally demanding. If they are moving from a family home, try to break the organizing and packing tasks into manageable pieces and move at a comfortable pace that doesn’t overwhelm you or your senior loved one – unless your loved one is at risk and needs to be moved quickly for their safety. Your decision-making confidence will increase, in turn reducing stress and anxiety for you and your loved one.
- Don’t discuss the details too much in advance.
To keep things as normal as possible for your loved one, you may want to keep your activities and plans in the background until necessary. Your loved one may not be able to participate in the decision-making process if they’re suffering from later stages of memory loss. For some, it may be helpful to think of a creative explanation for the change of location if you anticipate significant challenges with the move. Therapeutic fibbing, in this case, may have potential benefits to help your loved one maintain dignity and feel more at ease during the transition period.
- Take your loved one to the community before they move in.
By touring the memory care community – or attending an event – before a move, your loved one may be able to meet the team and see some of the daily activities that residents enjoy. Getting to know you and your loved one in this way will also benefit the community’s team and leadership.
- Decide what your loved one will need in their new space.
Draw a floor plan based on the new space’s measurements to determine what your loved one will need to fit and what items you may want to purchase. It’s important to take familiar items that will help your loved one feel at home in a new environment. Whenever possible, take items that have been part of their lives for quite a while. Pack photographs and other treasures that may spark memories.
- Organize your schedule leading up to moving day.
Plan a schedule for the various tasks you need to accomplish from now until your move-in day as soon as you know your move-in date. Begin the process of downsizing and organizing as early as possible. Talk with experts who can help you plan a smooth move and research moving resources. Remember to connect with the memory care community to help you find some of these local support services.
- Give yourself a break by working with the community team.
Moving a loved one is only the beginning of the process. Once they’re physically settled into their new home, your loved one will need some time and assistance to become comfortable and learn a new routine with new faces, new places, etc. Lean on the community’s team for guidance and support. Ask for tips and suggestions on how often and when you should visit in the early days to help make the transition as smooth as possible.
Enhancing Quality of Life
Bridges® by EPOCH memory care communities have been developed from the ground up to anticipate, meet and exceed the needs of our residents and their families. Our team of remarkable people, the exceptional care and services we offer, and the purposeful design of our buildings all combine to create the most rewarding, secure and nurturing lifestyle possible for our residents.
We understand the concern families feel about ensuring quality of life for loved ones. That’s why, at Bridges® by EPOCH, we offer a wellness-centered lifestyle that focuses on reinforcing individual strength, so residents enjoy heightened confidence and self-esteem. Ultimately, we provide everything residents need to thrive and rediscover a life with purpose.
Bridges® communities are located in Connecticut, Massachusetts and New Hampshire, in the following towns: Norwalk, CT; Stamford, CT; Trumbull, CT; Andover, MA; Hingham, MA; Lexington, MA; Mashpee, MA; Pembroke, MA; Sudbury, MA; Westford, MA; Westwood, MA; and Nashua, NH.
Inspiration for Success
At our Bridges® by EPOCH communities, we work closely with families to gain necessary insight and deeper understanding into the lives of our residents upon admission. With this initial information, along with what our exceptional team members learn about our residents every day, we are best prepared to provide highly individualized programming for our residents.
Bridges® by EPOCH is New England’s largest stand-alone memory care assisted living provider.