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Advice by Alicia: Coping with Difficult Emotions When a Loved One Is Diagnosed with Memory Loss

Monday, February 21, 2022

Alicia Seaver is the Vice President of Memory Care Operations for EPOCH Senior Living and a Certified Memory Impairment Specialist. Every month, she addresses a specific issue related to memory and memory care. If you’re interested in hearing about a particular topic, please send a note to [email protected].

 

Q: My loved one was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and suffers from memory loss. What are some healthy ways that I can deal with my feelings about it?

 

A: It’s always extremely difficult when someone you love is diagnosed with a life-altering disease such as Alzheimer’s disease or another type of dementia. Many people experience a range of emotions – sometimes even contradictory emotions. You may have feelings of shock, deep sadness, fear or grief. On the other hand, you may also have a sense of relief in knowing with certainty what has been causing your loved one’s symptoms.

 

No matter what you are feeling, coming to terms with a diagnosis takes time. Giving yourself some grace in processing this new information is important. Below are some tips and strategies for coping with a dementia diagnosis in your loved one.

 

Accept the diagnosis.

Allowing yourself time to grieve your losses and process the news is critical. However, don’t let denial or fear hold you back from seeking help. The earlier you and your loved one address the illness, the sooner you can begin the process of adjusting to the coming changes. An early diagnosis allows you to access treatment options for your loved one and gives more time to plan for the future – with your loved one’s input. Accepting the diagnosis is the first major step to moving forward.

 

Ask for help from friends and family.

Taking on this challenge alone is impossible. Find someone that you can confide in to get the difficult emotions off your chest. Enlist support from family members and discuss how future caregiving duties may be divided. Ask a friend to help tackle something from your to-do list if needed. Remember, it’s always okay to ask for help.

 

Educate yourself on dementia.

Each person’s experience with Alzheimer’s or other forms of dementia is unique. You will feel less frustrated and better prepared for future challenges if you have a deeper understanding of cognitive impairment and how the condition usually progresses, and specifically, how the symptoms manifest in your loved one’s behavior. Online training resources, seminars – such as our monthly education series – and books can help you learn new caregiving skills.

 

Find resources for education and support.

There are many community resources and organizations that can help provide support in your memory care journey, such as the Alzheimer’s Association®, the Family Caregiver Alliance or the National Institute on Aging. The Senior Advisor at your local Bridges® by EPOCH community is also a wonderful source of information and local resources – even if you never move into one of our communities.

One of the best things that caregivers can do is join a support group. Other people who have dealt with the same challenges will be able to share their experiences with you. This shared experience brings you closer to both your loved one and the community of family caregivers – and can even help reduce feelings of stress, frustration or fear. Each month, Bridges® by EPOCH hosts a caregiver support group via Zoom that has helped countless families coping with the challenges of memory loss. Simply reach out to the Senior Advisor at the community closest to you to register.

 

Plan for the future.

Plan for your loved one’s future care now rather than later. This will help to reduce future stress for you – and make your loved one feel comfortable that they have played a part in the major decisions about their own healthcare needs.

As a progressive disease, the symptoms of dementia gradually worsen over time. Eventually, most individuals require 24-hour care and significant support with the activities of daily living. For many families, this becomes too difficult to manage at home and they transition their loved one to a senior living community that offers dedicated care for those with Alzheimer’s disease or other types of dementia. Bridges® by EPOCH’s memory care communities are purposefully and exclusively designed to care for the unique needs of those with memory loss.

 

For local resources, support groups or more information about Bridges® by EPOCH, we invite you to reach out to the Senior Advisor at your local community.

 

About Bridges® by EPOCH

Bridges® by EPOCH is New England’s largest stand-alone memory care assisted living provider. Communities are located in Connecticut, Massachusetts and New Hampshire, in the following towns: Norwalk, CT; Stamford, CT (coming soon); Trumbull, CT; Andover, MA; Hingham, MA; Lexington, MA; Mashpee, MA; Pembroke, MA; Sudbury, MA; Westford, MA; Westwood, MA; Nashua, NH.

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