Being a caregiver is an all-encompassing role that can seemingly take over your life. This is especially true if you’re a spousal caregiver. Taking care of your spouse “in sickness and in health” is natural, but it’s important to make sure you’re taking care of yourself, too.

“Caring for yourself is the best thing you can do for your loved one,” says Addie Ricci, Executive Director at Bridges® by EPOCH at Norwalk, located in Norwalk, CT. Most often, she says, spousal caregivers are older as well, and often have their own health issues to deal with. “We talk a lot about the oxygen mask metaphor, where flight attendants tell you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others,” she says. “It’s a similar situation here. First, care for yourself, and then you’ll be better able to care for others.”

Still, that’s easier said than done. “Even if you logically know this is the right thing to do, it can still feel selfish to pay attention to your needs before your loved one’s needs,” Addie says. “However, it’s not an either/or situation. You can care for yourself while also caring for your loved one – it may require a little more coordination, but it is certainly not impossible to do.”

Addie says that this is doubly important for spousal caregivers, who often carry a heavier mental and emotional burden than caregivers who are providing assistance for friends or parents. “When your spouse has dementia or another cognitive illness, the spouse is losing more than just their relationship; they’re losing the future they had envisioned together,” she says. “Understanding that loss, coping with it and finding healthy ways to continue to move forward is essential.”

Here are some ways to help accomplish that.

1. Visit your doctor.

If you haven’t done so already this year, schedule your yearly health and wellness check with your physician. This is a great opportunity for you to get your bloodwork done, get an overall checkup and talk with your doctor about any medications you’re taking (or what you should be taking). He or she can also let you know about any procedures or supplements that can help keep you in the best possible health. While a yearly visit is good, it’s also important to check in with your doctor when you’re feeling under the weather or have some health issue that’s starting to pop up. Catching a concern early can keep it from becoming a huge issue down the road. Bonus: these days, many doctor’s appointments can take place virtually, so they’re a little easier to squeeze into your busy day.

2. Exercise regularly.

Moving your body and getting the required amount of exercise has numerous health benefits for caregivers. It helps improve your mood, reduces stress and anxiety and helps boost your immune system, among other benefits. Even taking a nightly walk around the block can help improve your health in many different ways. Although you might not have the time or the ability to go to the gym for a two-hour workout, that’s all right – 30 minutes a day, five days a week, is all that you need to reap the health benefits. Remember that things like riding bikes, dancing, gardening or cleaning are all ways to get exercise. If 30 minutes feels like too much at once, break sessions up into 10-minute chunks and you’ll be amazed how much exercise you’ll actually be able to get.

3. Eat a healthy diet.

When you’re tired and stressed out, often the last thing you want to think about is cooking a healthy meal (not to mention all the work related to prepping and cleaning up after it). However, eating overly processed foods or takeout can wreak havoc on your health (as well as the health of your loved one). Instead, choose a diet filled with easy, whole foods like fruits and vegetables, healthy grains, lean proteins and healthy fats. These days, many grocery stores have pre-packaged meal kits that make a delicious and healthy meal easy to prepare. If getting to the store is difficult, look into delivery services (which many stores offer) to lighten your load and make it easier to keep your fridge stocked with the right foods.

4. Mediate (or otherwise reduce your stress levels).

When we’re stressed, our bodies go into “fight or flight” response mode. While this is okay for a short amount of time and can actually be productive in the short term, remaining at this level will ultimately start making you sick. That’s because when we’re stressed, cortisol gets pumped throughout our bodies, which can lead to hypertension and a lowered immune system. It’s essential to find time every day – even for just 5 minutes – to breathe and get yourself in a less-stressed headspace. Meditation is a great way to do this. Studies have shown that people who practice meditation find their stress levels drop almost instantly. If you’re new to meditation, look for guided practices online to get you started. As you progress, you can look for other ways to practice meditation and mindfulness that work for you, such as yoga or tai chi.

5. Make room for your relationship.

One of the hardest things for spousal caregivers is the loss of the relationship with their spouse. It’s easy to slip into full “caregiver” mode and let the romantic relationship fall to the back burner. However, it’s essential that you make time to nurture the relationship you have with your loved one. Find ways to connect, whether that’s taking a walk together, looking through photo albums or doing whatever else that you and your spouse enjoyed doing in the past. Remembering and honoring the spousal relationship you have will be beneficial for both of you, and will provide meaningful memories that will sustain both of you throughout this journey.

Expert, Life-Enriching Memory Care

Bridges® by EPOCH at Norwalk provides memory care assisted living that is comfortable, positive, safe and engaging. Exclusively dedicated to caring for those with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia, our community promotes a wellness-focused lifestyle that emphasizes dignity and individual preferences. Our memory care professionals receive specialized, ongoing training designed to help residents maximize their independence in a secure, calm environment – making a truly positive impact on the lives of our residents.

Inspiring Programs for All Stages

Bridges® by EPOCH at Norwalk’s services are designed to recognize and adapt to the unique challenges and individuality of each resident, while ensuring comfort and safety. We believe in a full-service approach to care and provide personalized attention and programming for residents in every stage of memory loss.

Purposeful Community Design

Within a beautiful residential design, Bridges® by EPOCH at Norwalk provides everything residents with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia need to enjoy comfort, familiarity and security. Soft colors, directional cues, aromatherapy and interactive life stations create a soothing and secure environment where residents feel at home.

Contact us today to learn more.