Alicia Seaver is the Vice President of Memory Care Operations for EPOCH Senior Living and a Certified Memory Impairment Specialist. Every month, she addresses a specific issue related to memory and memory care. If you’re interested in hearing about a particular topic, please send a note to [email protected].
Q: This should come as no surprise, but as a caregiver, I’m stressed to the max! Between social distancing, health precautions, services being halted and everything else, I feel like everything is fraught with anxiousness. What can I do to care for my loved one and keep myself sane at the same time?
A: Caregivers shoulder a heavy burden during “normal” times and have to cope with and manage their stress appropriately. But during challenging times – like right now – that stress gets cranked to 11. Not only do they have to continue to provide daily care to their senior loved one, but they’re juggling the fear and worry that comes along with a pandemic like COVID-19.
There’s a mantra I’ve found myself saying on a regular basis during these trying months – give yourself grace. That’s much easier said than done, but you must remember that you can’t do it all and you can’t control everything. It’s easy to spin out and worry yourself sick about your loved one contracting COVID-19 and developing health issues, plus feeling burned out because your usual services and support aren’t available, plus taking care of your regular caregiving duties.
According to a June survey by the UsAgainstAlzheimer’s A-LIST®, 92 percent of Alzheimer’s caregivers say their stress is higher now because of the coronavirus. That’s a 10-point increase since a similar survey in late March. Frankly, I’m surprised that it wasn’t a unanimous 100 percent of caregivers feeling that way.
All that is to say – it’s more important than ever that caregivers develop strategies and practice habits that will help maintain and nurture their own well-being and personal health. Not only will this help you protect yourself and your loved one from contracting coronavirus, but it will also help you avoid the ever-constant risk of caregiver burnout.
Stay informed – but avoid media overload. It’s a smart idea to stay informed about the state of COVID-19 in your particular area. It’s not a smart idea to keep checking your newsfeed constantly and let yourself become consumed by the state of affairs. Studies show that a constant barrage of bad news and media overload can become overwhelming, both mentally and emotionally, and can cause depression, anxiety and a slew of other negative issues. No surprise there. So instead of clicking “refresh” or continuing to scroll every other minute, put your phone down, take a breath and do something nice for yourself. By focusing your mind on something besides COVID-19, you’ll reduce your stress level greatly.
Take care of yourself. Now, more than ever, it’s important to care for your health and well-being. Be sure to eat a healthy diet, get enough exercise and get enough sleep. Be sure to talk to your doctor about any issues you may be having, and make sure you’re taking your medications.
Watch for burnout. Stress is a normal feeling when you’re a caregiver, but if you find you’re feeling hopeless or depressed, having difficulty sleeping (or sleeping too much), are overly fatigued or having difficulty coping with day-to-day tasks, you could potentially be suffering from burnout. If you recognize the beginnings of these signs, take steps to get yourself some help – whether in the form of a home aid, help from friends or family or any other way to get work off your plate so you can rest and relax a little bit. Bridges® by EPOCH is offering monthly virtual caregiver support groups to help those who are struggling with a loved one with memory loss at home. It’s a time to share struggles as well as coping strategies with others who are in similar situations. You can reach out to your local community’s Senior Advisor for login details.
Find ways to relax. Easier said than done, I know! But take time out of your day – even just 10 minutes – to do something for yourself and relax. Meditate, read a book, take a bath or call a friend to chat. Anything that fills your soul and makes you feel calm and at peace – or simply makes you feel good – is a good thing. Make it a habit during your day, whether it’s the first thing you do or the last thing before you go to bed at night.
Stay connected. Even though we’re social distancing, you don’t have to be socially isolated. Check in with friends and family through Zoom, Skype, Facetime or other video conferencing apps so you can see and talk to them in real time. Consider “driveway meetings” so you can keep six feet apart yet still see people. And be sure to reach out regularly just to say hi or to send a kind word. We all need that during these uncertain times.
This is a difficult and unprecedented occurrence in our lives, but please know that it is possible to care for yourself and your loved one without adding to your stress. Take care of yourself, take care of your loved one and ask for help when needed.
Enhancing Quality of Life
Bridges® by EPOCH communities have been developed from the ground up to anticipate, meet and exceed the needs of our residents and their families. Our team of remarkable people, the exceptional care and services we offer and the purposeful design of our buildings all combine to create the most rewarding, secure and nurturing lifestyle possible for our residents.
We understand the concern families feel about ensuring quality of life for loved ones. That’s why, at Bridges® by EPOCH, we offer a wellness-centered lifestyle that focuses on reinforcing individual strength so residents enjoy heightened confidence and self-esteem. Ultimately, we provide everything residents need to thrive and rediscover a life with purpose.
Inspiration for Success
At our Bridges® by EPOCH communities, we work closely with families to gain necessary insight and deeper understanding into the lives of our residents upon admission. With this initial information, along with what our exceptional team members learn about our residents each and every day, we are best prepared to provide highly individualized programming for our residents.