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Six Tips for Successful Caregiving Through the Holidays

For many people, the holidays are a joyful time to gather with friends and family and lighten our spirits. If you’re a family caregiver for a senior loved one, you may be both looking forward to and dreading this time of year. Sure, it’s great to be with those we love and celebrate family traditions, but the holidays also bring a lot of extra stress and a lot more to accomplish.

“Caregivers are already juggling a multitude of responsibilities, so the holidays can feel like just one more straw to break the camel’s back,” says Cindy Wirth, Executive Director of Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury, a memory care assisted living community in Sudbury, MA. But, she says, the holidays don’t have to be something you dread. Far from it, in fact. “This year, why not give yourself the gift of a break?” she says. “With some adjustments and a new outlook, it can be easier than you think to have a successful holiday season while still being an effective caregiver.”

The trick is, she says, to redefine what’s important at the holidays. “Many of us have this idea in our heads of the perfect Hallmark holiday where all the decorations are coordinated, all the meals are homemade and all the presents are perfect,” she says. “Remember, though, what the holidays are really about: spending time together and sharing the joy that comes from being with those you love.”

With that in mind, here are six tips to help you make this holiday season less bah humbug and more holly-jolly.

Tip #1: Remember the meaning of the season. 

The holidays aren’t about perfection. Instead, they’re about joy and togetherness. “Perfection” requires you to have ultimate control over the situation (which, as a caregiver, you know is a complete pipe dream). Instead of being aggravated over not being able to control certain factors, why not flip the script and let that be a freeing thought? Everything doesn’t have to be perfect as long as the important needs are met: family, friends, good food and fun times.

Tip #2: Simplify, simplify, simplify. 

To keep with the spirit of imperfect perfection, don’t get wrapped up in trying to do everything this holiday season. There are only so many hours in the day, and many of them are already spent caring for your loved one (and the six million other aspects of your life). So if the idea of decking the halls makes you exhausted just thinking about it, remember that you don’t have to go full-on Martha Stewart. If you can’t decorate the entire house, do what you can – even if that’s just putting up a mini pre-decorated tree. If possible, do pull out some holiday items that are the most significant to you. Another option is to ask friends or family members to help you decorate (or even pay someone to do it). Don’t feel like you have to accept invites to every holiday party – go to one or two, or none at all if you don’t feel like it. And if you’re not up to traveling for big family celebrations? See if people can come to you instead, or hold your own mini-gathering with those closest to you.

Tip #3: Adapt your favorite traditions or start new ones. 

We all love family traditions, but as our loved ones age, it may become necessary to adapt them. Instead of focusing on the things he or she can’t do, try something new or approach old traditions in a new way. For example, if you’ve always attended a performance of the Nutcracker, stream a performance and watch from the comfort of your home. Or if you can’t make a holiday gathering, do a quick video chat with Skype or Facetime. Go on a holiday light tour, or start a new holiday movie night tradition with classic favorites and some new options thrown in as well.

Tip #4: Don’t fret over food.

Quick! What’s one of your favorite parts of the holiday season? We bet at least one of your favorite things is food … which makes sense, since food plays such a huge role in our holiday celebrations. However, food can become difficult when your loved one has special dietary needs, or if you simply don’t have time to cook a big meal. Rather than grieving your inability to throw an old-fashioned holiday meal, simplify and rightsize your culinary traditions to better fit your reality. For example:

  • Make the meal simpler with fewer side dishes and desserts
  • Hold a potluck-style dinner so that the responsibility is spread out among more people
  • Have the meal catered in or go to a restaurant – there’s no reason it has to be “home cooked”

Tip #5: Be kind to yourself.

You deserve to enjoy the holidays, too. So find ways to stay mindful and do nice things for yourself at least once a day. Remember, being negative can actually stress you out and cause real physical problems. Instead of dwelling on what you can’t or aren’t able to do, focus on what is getting done and the happiness you’re able to create and see every day. Surround yourself with positive people who make you feel good about yourself (instead of dragging you down). Eat a healthy diet and get regular exercise, although it’s okay to indulge within reason. Don’t forget to treat yourself here and there, whether that’s a walk around the block, a cup of cocoa before bed or a relaxing bath. A little self-care goes a long way.

Tip #6: Ask for help.

You may not normally ask for help during the year. But the holidays are the perfect time to take some of the load off your shoulders, even for a few hours. With so many family and friends around, you’ll be amazed at how many are willing to help with holiday preparations, run errands or even watch your loved one for a time. Don’t be shy to reach out and ask for specific requests, like having someone research community resources, or finding someone who can help wrap gifts or anything else. Being specific about your needs will make it easier for people to say yes – and easier for you to get a little extra dash of holiday joy.

Most importantly, remember that this time of the year is precious for you, your loved one and your family. As a caregiver, you know that this holiday season is special. Savor the time you have together, make memories and enjoy every happy thing this holiday season brings.

Engaging Lifestyle.

Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury provides exceptional memory care in a comfortable, upbeat and engaging environment. Designed specifically to support people with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia, Bridges® by EPOCH creates a wellness-focused lifestyle that respects individual preferences. Our teams receive ongoing, specialized training so they may help residents to safely exercise their independence and individuality in a secure, calm environment.

Dedicated Memory Care

We provide complete peace of mind for families and residents experiencing early-, mid- or late-stage memory loss. Our expert dementia care, Personalized Services and personalized programs are tailored to meet the physical, cognitive and emotional needs of each resident wherever they are on their journey, allowing them to age in place safely, comfortably and with respect.

Welcoming, Purpose-Built Design.

Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury is more than a safe, beautiful place to live; it’s truly a home, where compassionate, dementia-educated caregivers help people with memory loss live more joyful lives and where families enjoy spending time together again. Our research-based design features soft lighting and colors, non-glare flooring, directional cues, aromatherapy and interactive life-enrichment stations that empower residents to comfortably move about their homes with confidence.

Contact us today to learn more.

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