Moving to a new place takes a lot of work, no matter what the situation. When you or a loved one is moving to a memory care community, there’s an extra level of work and coordination that needs to take place. For someone with dementia, the change in routine, an unfamiliar environment and the discombobulation of picking up an entire life and fitting it to a new space is particularly jarring.
The best thing caregivers, family members and the individual with dementia can do is plan, plan and plan some more, says Eric Kessler, Executive Director of Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood, a memory care assisted living community in Westwood, MA. “Knowing what to expect, how to prepare and how to find support for both you and your loved one can make the move to memory care as smooth a transition as possible,” he says. “Before you take any steps, be sure to research as much as you can and ask for support from experts who can help you navigate all the ins and outs. We suggest reaching out to the memory care community your loved one is moving into or reaching out to memory care experts, such as staff members at Bridges by EPOCH at Westwood, who are well-versed in helping individuals transition into their new home at a memory care community.”
Here are Eric’s top tips for creating a plan to move a loved one into memory care.
Begin the conversation early.
If your loved one is still in the early stages of dementia when diagnosed, take the initiative to research communities and discuss care options while they’re still able to make informed decisions. If they’re involved in the process, this will allow for a smoother transition when it’s time to move them into a community. It also provides peace of mind for everyone involved and gives your loved one a level of independence and ownership in the process. You may also want to discuss the option of moving into a memory care community before it’s officially “needed.” Even if your loved one doesn’t require all of the services a memory care community requires, it can be beneficial to move to a community in the earlier stages of the disease so that the community becomes “home.”
However, says Eric, many individuals aren’t diagnosed with dementia until the middle stages of the disease. By the time the family has reached the point where their loved one needs more help than they can provide, discussing the move to memory care can be more upsetting than helpful. In those situations, he says, it’s best to wait until the move is forthcoming to discuss what’s going to happen. Although it may feel like a bit of a betrayal, it’s better to get all your ducks in a row and approach the move in a way that will upset your loved one as little as possible.
Downsize appropriately.
No matter how big or small your loved one’s current home is, downsizing for a move to memory care is inevitable. This can be a particularly challenging process, since it will involve going through items that have a lifetime of memories attached to them. Here are some tips that you can use to help make downsizing a little less painful:
- Make a list of the “must haves” before doing any sorting and choose items that are absolutely needed to make the new place feel like home.
- Take measurements of the new space in order to make sure that the things you are taking will fit in your loved one’s new home.
- Go through the unsentimental stuff first, like kitchen appliances and such.
- Have trusted friends and family help, which can make the process less painful and less time-consuming.
- Find creative ways to store beloved items. For example, if your loved one has a large collection of antique thimbles, choose one or two to display in their new home and take photos of the rest.
- Don’t throw anything away if you can help it. Instead, donate to charity or give away sentimental items to family members and friends.
- If you or your loved one become too overwhelmed, consider hiring a senior move specialist to manage everything from downsizing to selling to packing and coordinating the physical move to the new community.
Communicate with the memory care staff throughout the process.
In order to provide the best possible care for your loved one, staff members at the new community want to get to know him or her so they understand their passions, preferences, interests, history and habits. The more they know about your loved one and the rest of your family, the easier it will be to have meaningful conversations and create a relationship right from the get-go. Staff members are also great advocates during the moving process, and can give you tips on how best to support your loved one, what you should or shouldn’t be doing and resources you can use to make the move as stress-free as possible.
“As a family caregiver, you’ll want to make sure you’re meeting with key resources to gain a better understanding of how the memory care community works,” says Eric. “Come prepared with questions, and don’t hesitate to ask for clarification, more information or anything else that will help you prepare yourself and your loved one for the move. Remember, the staff are there to help and want to provide the safest, most comfortable and most supportive environment for your loved one as they can. Consider them as part of your new family, and don’t be afraid to reach out at any time.”
Visit the memory care community several times before moving day.
Being familiar with the community can help make the move less scary. As the big day approaches, take your loved one to the community for several visits in order to meet the staff, start relationships with other residents, join in on activities and eat in the dining room. Spending time in the community and becoming familiar with everything will help your loved one feel more secure, and will also help ease your mind, too.
Look into transition programs and services.
While most of your plans will drive towards actually moving your loved one into the community, remember that moving day is just the beginning of a transition period for your loved one – and for you. Moving is a big physical transition, but it’s also a major emotional transition that can take some time to process once the dust has settled. For your loved one, you’ll want to make sure that you work with the memory care staff to determine how often you should visit following the move and what you can do to help keep him or her calm and happy as they adjust to life in the new community. For you and other family members and caregivers, you may wish to find support through a counselor or a social worker at the memory care community.
“At Bridges by EPOCH at Westwood, we don’t just provide care for our residents, but also the family members of our residents,” says Eric. “We understand that dementia affects the entire family, and that it’s a journey requiring support every step of the way. We’re always available to help inform, support and give advice to our families as they navigate the dementia journey along with their loved ones. In fact, it’s our honor to do so.”
Personalized Lifestyle
Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood provides assisted living memory care that is comfortable, positive, safe and engaging. Exclusively dedicated to caring for those with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia or memory impairment, we’ve created a wellness-focused lifestyle that promotes dignity and individual preferences. Our memory care professionals receive specialized and ongoing training designed to help residents maximize their independence in a secure, calm environment – making a truly positive impact on the lives of our residents each and every day.
Personalized Services
Our care and services are designed to recognize and adapt to the individual challenges and personalities of our residents, while making sure they are comfortable and safe. We believe in a full-service approach to care and provide a high level of personalized attention for every resident through all stages of memory loss.
Our Amenities
Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood features a distinct design, providing residents with everything they need to enjoy comfort, familiarity and security. Our community is built specifically to benefit those with Alzheimer’s disease and memory loss … so we use soft colors, directional cues, aromatherapy and interactive life stations to create a soothing, safe environment where residents feel at ease.
Contact us today to learn more.