A Day in the Life of Someone With Dementia

What is daily life like for an individual with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia or other memory impairments? If you’re a caretaker or simply know someone living with these diseases, you probably already have a clear picture of what it looks like. But do you know what it feels like? What life is actually like for that particular individual?

“Dementias such as Alzheimer’s disease are complex and very personal,” says Jennifer Trout, Executive Director of Bridges® by EPOCH at Hingham, a memory care assisted living community in Hingham, MA. “There’s no ‘typical day’ because the disease can change at any time. However, by gaining understanding of your loved one’s difficulties, you can make the journey easier for everyone involved.”

To begin understanding what your loved one is going through, you need to first determine what stage of dementia they are in, whether early, mid or late stages. Each stage comes with its own unique challenges and ways of addressing it successfully.

A Day In The Life Of Early Dementia

Mary, a senior living on her own, wakes up in the morning and everything is, well, a little off. She’s able to get her tasks done – go to the store, clean the bathrooms and that kind of thing – but she has little mix ups, like putting on her shirt backwards or forgetting to put grounds in the coffeemaker so she ends up with a cup of hot water. After her daughter, Carla, comes over for a short visit, Mary can’t find her keys, and insists that Carla must have stolen them or hidden them somewhere. They argue for a moment until Mary finds her keys stashed away in the cupboard. Later on that day, a friend comes over to say hi, but Mary has trouble remembering who she is until the friend prompts her memory. This makes Mary angry, and more than a little frustrated.

For individuals in early dementia, their days are very similar to this: almost normal, but not quite there. They’re still able to follow routines and live somewhat comfortably on their own, but learning or doing new things has become stressful or difficult. They can forget what they did or said earlier that day, and it just becomes tiring to think. They often forget what they are doing or why they’re doing something.

Early dementia often goes undiagnosed because the symptoms are considered “senior moments.” It’s frustrating for both the senior, their friends and loved ones, who all notice something isn’t quite right but they can’t put their fingers on it.

If you’re helping a loved one who is in the very early stages of dementia, here are a few ways to help them navigate their changes:

  • Do what you can to help them live as independently and safely as possible by making appointments and providing reminders
  • Work together with your loved one to determine the best course of action moving forward
  • Encourage the individual with dementia to discuss their feelings or find therapy if you feel it’s needed
  • Help the senior live well by promoting physical health, eating right, staying active and visiting the doctor on a regular basis

A Day in the Life of Moderate Dementia

For Sam, a widowed senior, every day is defined in moments. Breakfast in the morning. The paper afterward. Getting dressed. Lunch at a certain time. Watching a certain TV program. Routine is comfortable and familiar, but anything out of the ordinary causes him to become anxious, frustrated and difficult. He has a care assistant who visits a few times a week, but if Sam needs to go somewhere out of the ordinary, he will refuse to get into the car.

All sorts of normal activities are becoming overstimulating and difficult for Sam. He finds it hard to take a shower, because of all the steps involved, the noise, the temperature changes and everything that must be done in order to get clean. Unfortunately he won’t allow anyone to help him out, even though he sometimes realizes he needs help, because it’s embarrassing. He’d rather go dirty than deal with that. Conversations are hard because he often forgets a word or becomes distracted. Although he usually knows who’s speaking to him, he has difficulty remembering names and faces – even of his own children.

Moderate dementia is the stage where most seniors are diagnosed with the disease, because it’s apparent that something serious is going on with mom or dad. This is also the longest stage of the disease and the one that causes the most stress and difficulty for caregivers (and the senior themselves). Here are a few ways to help your loved one cope through this stage of dementia:

  • Develop a daily routine and keep to a regular structure as much as possible to avoid agitation
  • Learn what respite care opportunities are available in your community, and use them when necessary
  • Be sure that neither you nor your loved one becomes socially isolated
  • Take care of yourself as well as the person with dementia.

A Day in the Life of Late-Stage Dementia

Cathy, who lives at a memory care community, is deep in the late stages of dementia. While she still enjoys listening to music, she often falls asleep while listening because the stimulation isn’t enough to keep her brain awake. Her speech has become incredibly limited, and although she sometimes has a full thought that she tries to get out, she can only say a few words or simply make sounds. It’s becoming increasingly difficult to understand what she’s saying, and she’s forgotten the faces and names of her loved ones. She lives in her own world, and although she’ll have sparks of memory and lucidity, she’s often sleeping.

Late-stage dementia, which can last weeks to years, requires around-the-clock care and is usually given in a hospital or a memory care community. While the amount of caregiving is high, this stage can also be a relief for caregivers in a sense, because although their loved one is slipping away, they are feeling very little pain and appear to be at peace. Here are some tips for helping your loved one be comfortable and happy during this stage of their memory care journey:

  • Express your caring through the senses, such as a gentle touch or by playing a favorite album
  • Spend an afternoon outside sitting in the sun with your loved one
  • Speak to your loved one or read a book aloud – even if he or she doesn’t respond, your voice will be heard
  • Consider hospice as end-of-life approaches

If you would like more information about dementia or how to care for someone with dementia , contact us at 781.749.7114.

Exceptional Care. Fulfilling Lifestyle.

Bridges® by EPOCH at Hingham provides assisted living and memory care that is comfortable, positive, safe and engaging. Exclusively dedicated to caring for those with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia or memory impairment, we’ve created a wellness-focused lifestyle that promotes dignity and individual preferences. Our memory care professionals receive specialized and ongoing training designed to help residents maximize their independence in a secure, calm environment – making a truly positive impact on the lives of our residents each and every day.

Dedicated Memory Care

No matter what level of care or service is needed, residents and families can rest assured that our programs address the various stages of memory decline, allowing residents the opportunity to age in place.

Personalized Services

At Bridges® by EPOCH at Hingham, our services are designed to recognize and adapt to the unique challenges and individuality of each resident, while ensuring comfort and safety. We believe in a full-service approach to care and provide a high level of personalized attention, no matter what stage of memory loss a resident may be experiencing.

Call us today at 781.749.7114 to learn more about Bridges® by EPOCH at Hingham or to schedule a personal tour.

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