The open road has long been a symbol of freedom and adventure. The vast majority of us will spend most of our lives driving versus not driving, and the idea of not being able to just get in a car and go is, well, not something we really want to consider.
However, when a loved one is diagnosed with dementia, one of the first issues caregivers and families face is whether or not it is still safe for the individual to drive. This is a tough decision because oftentimes, when dementia is diagnosed, the senior is still capable of driving safely, and so it may not get discussed right away, if at all. However, since dementia is a progressive disease, your loved one’s symptoms will eventually increase until driving is no longer an option … at which point, getting them to give up their keys may be a struggle.
“Since driving is the ultimate expression of freedom and self-reliance, losing the privilege can be incredibly upsetting to seniors,” says Cindy Wirth, Executive Director of Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury, a memory care assisted living community in Sudbury, MA. “While some seniors with dementia will understand the risks on their own and limit or stop their driving in advance, others will be unable to assess their ability and may stubbornly insist on driving, even if it’s obviously no longer safe.”
Since dementia develops differently for each individual, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly when your loved one isn’t able to drive anymore. As with most things associated with dementia, says Cindy, there are tips and guidelines to help caregivers determine the safety of their senior (and everyone else on the road).
Generally, individuals who want to keep driving and are only experiencing mild dementia should have their driving skills evaluated to see if it’s still an option. However, those with moderate or severe dementia should never drive because their cognitive abilities have decreased to the point where making necessary judgments takes too long or is not possible.
Observe Your Loved One’s Behavior
You don’t have to get in a car with your loved one to determine his or her level of functioning. In fact, it’s best to observe behavior in an everyday setting, during their normal routine. Based on how they’re acting, you should be able to assess if they have the skills needed to operate a motor vehicle. If your loved one exhibits some (or all) of the following behaviors, they may no longer have the ability to drive safely:
- Losing coordination
- Gets lost easily or feels disoriented, even in familiar places
- Has difficulty judging distances and space
- Finds it hard to engage in more than one task at a time
- Has become less alert to things happening around him or her
- Has an increase in memory loss, especially for events that have just happened
- Needs to be prompted to handle personal care like bathing or grooming
- Has frequent mood swings and is irritable or confused easily
- Has difficulty with problem-solving, decision-making and processing information
Although this list is a good guideline, it’s important to compare current behavior with the way the person reacted prior to their dementia diagnosis. For example, if Grandma has never had a great sense of direction, becoming lost easily may not necessarily be a concerning sign. Behavioral changes will be most apparent to family members and friends who have close contact with the individual on a regular basis.
Involve Your Loved One in the Discussion
Your loved one should always be included in discussions. Just because he or she has dementia doesn’t mean the desire to be treated with respect and as an individual goes away. You may find that your loved one is relieved to stop driving when it’s suggested. However, many more are upset or angry at the thought of losing their independence.
No matter how your loved one reacts, encourage them to talk about their feelings and find ways for them to be in control of the situation as much as possible. You might want to consider joining a support group where you and your loved one can get advice from others who’ve been through the same situation. If the discussion becomes too fraught with emotion, you may want to ask a physician or care manager to bring up the topic – a neutral third party may be easier to get the information from.
Begin Limiting Driving
Even if your loved one is still able to drive safely at the moment, it’s important to remember that this will not always be the case, and they should begin modifying their driving to help make the eventual transition easier and keep them as safe as possible. Here are some ways to help your loved one move out of the driver’s seat and reduce their need to drive:
- Avoid heavy traffic whenever possible and take familiar roads
- Avoid driving at night, in bad weather or for long distances
- Arrange for items like prescriptions, groceries and meals to be delivered to their home
- Invite family and friends to your loved one’s home for visits instead of going out
- Coordinate social outings where your friends and family can take your loved one places
When You Have to Make the Hard Decision
Eventually, your loved one will have to stop driving – whether on their own or by force. As much as possible, you should maintain respect for and patience with your loved one, and understand their feelings. However, safety is the number one priority. You may find that you have to forcibly prevent his or her access to the car. Here are some methods of making that happen:
- Hiding car keys
- Selling the car or otherwise disabling it
- Replacing keys with a set that don’t work
- Moving the car out of sight
Deciding when to take the keys away from a loved one with dementia is emotionally trying and difficult for caregivers. In order to help ease the burden, talk to other family members, friends, care professionals and support networks to help you make and implement decisions about driving.
If you would like more information about managing dementia-related issues like taking the car keys away, contact us at 978.261.7007.
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Now open! Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury provides exceptional memory care in a comfortable, upbeat and engaging environment. Designed specifically to support people with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia, Bridges® by EPOCH creates a wellness-focused lifestyle that respects individual preferences. Our teams receive ongoing, specialized training so they may help residents to safely exercise their independence and individuality in a secure, calm environment.
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We provide complete peace of mind for families and residents experiencing early-, mid- or late-stage memory loss. Our expert dementia care, Personalized Services and personalized programs are tailored to meet the physical, cognitive and emotional needs of each resident wherever they are on their journey, allowing them to age in place safely, comfortably and with respect.
Welcoming, Purpose-Built Design
Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury is more than a safe, beautiful place to live; it’s truly a home, where compassionate, dementia-educated caregivers help people with memory loss live more joyful lives and where families enjoy spending time together again. Our research-based design features soft lighting and colors, non-glare flooring, directional cues, aromatherapy and interactive life-enrichment stations that empower residents to comfortably move about their homes with confidence.
Call us today at 978.261.7007 to learn more about Bridges® by EPOCH at Sudbury or to schedule a personal tour.