Dementias such as Alzheimer’s disease often cause loved ones to act in unpredictable, different and difficult ways. Some normally calm individuals suddenly become aggressive or anxious. Others will repeat questions, words or gestures – often excessively. These and many other behaviors can lead to frustration, misunderstanding and anger between the caregiver and their loved one.
“Dementia-related behaviors do not appear logical to us, which can make it very hard for caregivers to understand and help their loved ones,” says Chrissy Ross, Executive Director of Bridges® by EPOCH at Mashpee. “However, when we understand the why of what’s causing a person to act in a particular way, their reactions become much more reasonable and understandable. It’s important for caregivers to learn about how dementia affects the brain and, thusly, their loved one’s reactions so they can better help their loved one with dementia.”
Caregivers need to remember that the individual with dementia is not trying to be difficult, says Chrissy. “Although their actions may make no sense to us, they are trying to communicate in the only way they know how,” she says. “Although we can’t prevent the changes that dementia works on the brain, we can take a look at some of the more common behaviors, understand why they’re occurring and find healthy, productive ways to deal with them.”
If caregivers change their thinking of the behaviors as actions and instead look at them as forms of communication, says Chrissy, it becomes easier to understand what’s occurring. “Behavior is one of the only ways that people with dementia can express themselves when their ability to use language is lost,” she says. “That doesn’t mean that caregivers have to accept and put up with challenging behaviors – it just means that they need to find ways to decode what their loved one is saying, identify the triggers and use helpful strategies to intervene and improve a situation.
Common Dementia-Related Behaviors
Dementia is a unique disease and affects each individual in different ways. Your loved one may present different challenging behaviors than another. Here are some of the most common behaviors and challenges that occur in those with dementia – as well as ways to help diffuse the situation.
Aggression, anger or verbal abuse. Aggressive behavior can range from physical to verbal to emotional. Instead of reacting to the behavior, it’s important for caregivers to figure out why the anger is happening, try to remedy the situation and then look for ways to avoid triggers in the future (when it’s possible).
- First, make sure that pain isn’t causing the behavior. Pain can cause people with dementia to become aggressive.
- Think about what may have just happened that might have triggered your loved one’s behavior. Did you ask him or her to do something? Did they see something on TV that may have affected them?
- Try not to get upset (even though it’s difficult). Speak slowly and calmly – your loved one will pick up on your emotions and reactions.
- Attempt to redirect your loved one through a relaxing activity. Put on some music, go for a walk or otherwise do something to help soothe your loved ones. Make sure their surroundings are quiet – if not, remove distractions and provide a calming environment.
Delusions, hallucinations or paranoia. Seeing things that aren’t there, holding beliefs that aren’t valid and being suspicious of others are all common behavioral issues of people with dementia. While these behaviors can be frightening and hurtful, remember that the changes are due to the way the disease is changing the brain health and chemistry.
- Avoid arguing with your loved one or using logic to explain a situation. The delusions or beliefs he or she is experiencing are very real to them, and using logic won’t help remedy the solution – in fact, it will more likely make it worse.
- Reassure your loved one that you are there for them, you love them and that you are sorry they are feeling the way they are.
- Don’t be offended. Give your loved one the opportunity to express themselves. Ask simple questions, acknowledge what they’re saying and try to be understanding.
- Redirect your loved one with a chore, game or anything else that will get his or her mind off of their current delusion.
- Consult with your loved one’s physician to determine if there are medications that can help (or, perhaps, if this is the side effect of a medication he or she is taking).
Difficulty communicating. Language issues are one of the first signs that someone has dementia. This can manifest as forgetting words, replacing common words with similar-but-not-the-same phrases, repeating questions or words continuously and other language-related issues.
- Instead of focusing on your loved one’s words, listen for the meaning in them. How is your loved one delivering their words? Stay calm and ask simple questions if necessary.
- Speak clearly, loudly and don’t overwhelm your loved one with complex answers.
- Pair verbal communication with gestures and other non-verbals, such as facial expressions, touch and body language.
- Limit distractions when speaking and pay attention to your loved one. Reassure him or her with a kind touch or a smile, which will help reduce frustration.
Sundowning or other forms of restlessness. Dementia can affect our circadian rhythm, which causes many people with dementia to worsen in the evenings (when the sun goes down), have difficulty sleeping or cause other forms of restlessness.
- Make sure your loved one is getting proper nutrition, and limit the consumption of sugar, caffeine or alcohol in the evening.
- Be sure your loved one is getting enough exercise during the day and discourage taking naps (which can greatly affect sleep patterns).
- Have a calming bedtime routine that your loved one can look forward to and will help wind him or her down well before it’s time to go to sleep.
- Ask their doctor about medications such as melatonin that may be able to help reduce issues and promote good sleep habits.
Wandering. Wandering and becoming lost is a very common symptom in those with dementia. In fact, six in 10 people with dementia will wander at some point. This can be very dangerous and will eventually result in the person requiring around-the-clock supervision.
- Make your home safe from wandering with door alarms, locks that require a key and child-safe plastic covers on doorknobs.
- You may wish to buy your loved one a tracking device that can be worn regularly.
- Talk to neighbors and friends and let them know that your loved one has the potential to wander – having their eyes and ears will help add an extra layer of protection.
- Make sure your loved one is getting enough activity during the day – wandering can be a sign of boredom or restlessness.
Peace of Mind for Cape Cod Seniors and Their Families
Bridges® by EPOCH at Mashpee provides memory care assisted living that is comfortable, positive, safe and engaging. Exclusively dedicated to caring for those with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia, our community creates a wellness-focused lifestyle that promotes dignity, respects individual preferences and makes a truly positive impact on the lives of our residents each and every day.
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Bridges® by EPOCH at Mashpee offers compassionate dementia care and unique programs that are tailored to meet the physical, cognitive and emotional needs of each resident – throughout every stage of disease progression. Residents can age in place comfortably and with dignity, while families gain peace of mind.
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At Bridges® by EPOCH at Mashpee, we offer a program of care and services that celebrates life and supports individual strengths. Our compassionate and engaging approach adapts to the unique challenges and individuality of each resident. Our memory care professionals receive specialized and ongoing training designed to help residents maximize their independence in a secure, calm environment.
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