Receiving a dementia diagnosis is a life-changing event. Even if you suspected – even expected getting that news, it can still be an emotionally charged event. It’s normal for you to experience a broad range of feelings – from anger to grief to despair to acceptance and anything in-between. It’s also normal to start wondering and worrying about what happens “next.” What will happen in the near and long-term? What plans need to be made in order to ensure your quality of life now and in the future?
Eric Kessler, Executive Director of Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood, a memory care assisted living community in Westwood, MA, stresses that, even though this diagnosis is a huge shift in your life, it doesn’t mean life is over. “It’s important to remember that there are many steps that can be taken to make sure that you or your loved one will thrive throughout the dementia journey. Dementia doesn’t mean that you suddenly can’t function anymore – you will still be able to live life, find fulfilling moments and create meaningful memories with your loved ones.”
While you or your loved one may instantly want to jump into “what should I plan” stage, Eric says the first step you or anyone else should take is acknowledging the new reality and dealing with the emotions and feelings that come with this discovery.
What You’re Feeling: How a Dementia Diagnosis May Affect You
Being diagnosed with dementia – much like being diagnosed with cancer or some other catastrophic disease – can cause many emotions right away as well as throughout the process. Some liken the emotional roller coaster to the stages of grief, and you or your loved ones may feel like you’re “mourning” what once was as you process over the days, weeks and months following the diagnosis. Understand that everything you’re feeling is natural and to be expected. Here are some emotions you may find yourself experiencing:
- Denial. It may seem impossible to believe that you have dementia. You can feel overwhelmed over how monumental this diagnosis is and how your life will change.
- Anger. Your life has taken a sudden shift and you can’t control what lies ahead. This isn’t what you’d planned for yourself or your family.
- Relief. At last, you have a name to put to the changes that you were experiencing. It means you weren’t imagining it – and now you have a path of action.
- Resentment. It’s not fair that this happened to you and not to someone else. What did you do to deserve this?
- Depression. You may be mourning the loss of your future, or thinking ahead to how the disease will progress and feeling hopeless and sad.
- Fear. You worry about how your family will be affected, how you will be affected and what is to come.
- Isolation. You can feel like you’re all alone and that no one understands what you’re going through.
Even if it may seem like you have “more important” things to focus on than your feelings, it’s critical to allow yourself to feel everything that comes up following a diagnosis. Share your feelings with friends, family members, a professional or important advisor. A support group may provide a space for you to feel safe from judgment and also gain important coping skills.
Next Steps Following Diagnosis
Once you’ve been able to begin understanding and acknowledging the emotional side of the diagnosis, here are helpful next steps to take to help you and your family deal with what’s ahead.
Learn everything you can about the disease. Although there has been much progress in helping dispel the myths and misconceptions about dementias such as Alzheimer’s disease, there’s a lot of bad information that’s still out there. At best, it can be misleading, and at worst, it could be harmful to you and your health. Ask your healthcare provider to recommend resources for learning (real, scientific) information about dementia in order to best prepare yourself for complications and challenges.
Maintain a consistent routine as much as possible. In the early stages of dementia, you may be able to function somewhat “normally,” but you may have issues with short-term memory loss. Make sure that you have a variety of “orienting objects” in your home, like appointment reminders, large clocks and calendars that can help you see the information you need at a glance. These reminders will help you accomplish everyday activities much more easily and help reduce confusion.
Put together your financial and legal affairs. Putting together a living will, powers of attorney and financial paperwork isn’t exactly how most of us want to spend a Saturday night. Although it may be tempting to put off these tasks as much as possible, it’s important to not delay putting future plans in order. Unfortunately, dementia causes individuals to lose their ability to think clearly and participate in decisions related to their future. As early as possible, you should work with important parties – family members and professionals – to put together the financial and legal documents that will be needed to help provide you with care as the disease progresses. Here are just some of the documents you should consider drafting:
- A living will (also known as an advance directive)
- Powers of attorney, both for finances and healthcare decisions (these can be two different parties)
- A last will and testament
- A Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) order, if that is your wish
Create your team. Your “team” consists of those who will be involved in decisions and support throughout your dementia journey. This can include friends, family, health care professionals, attorneys and financial advisors as well as counselors, therapists and community resources. Just as it takes a village to raise a child, so does it take a village to support you and provide the very best care. Having your team to lean on during the trying times will bring comfort and peace of mind to you and your loved ones.
While a diagnosis of dementia can be discombobulating at best, understand that you are not alone. There are many people just like you living with early- to mid-stage dementia who are taking steps to live as independently as possible and create fulfilling moments and memories every day.
“At Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood, we understand the importance of providing quality care to individuals with dementia as well as their family members,” says Eric. “It is our honor to serve and care at this time of life, and our unique community has been designed specifically to meet your needs in order to help you live a safe, positive engaged life.”
For more information about next steps following a dementia diagnosis, or to learn more about the services and resources available from Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood, please contact us on our website.
Personalized Lifestyle
Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood provides assisted living memory care that is comfortable, positive, safe and engaging. Exclusively dedicated to caring for those with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia or memory impairment, we’ve created a wellness-focused lifestyle that promotes dignity and individual preferences. Our memory care professionals receive specialized and ongoing training designed to help residents maximize their independence in a secure, calm environment – making a truly positive impact on the lives of our residents each and every day.
Personalized Services
Our care and services are designed to recognize and adapt to the individual challenges and personalities of our residents, while making sure they are comfortable and safe. We believe in a full-service approach to care and provide a high level of personalized attention for every resident through all stages of memory loss.
Our Amenities
Bridges® by EPOCH at Westwood features a distinct design, providing residents with everything they need to enjoy comfort, familiarity and security. Our community is built specifically to benefit those with Alzheimer’s disease and memory loss … so we use soft colors, directional cues, aromatherapy and interactive life stations to create a soothing, safe environment where residents feel at ease.
Contact us today to learn more.